^ i really wanna sleep but blaze hike recce :(

ok in the end i wasn't productive at all because i did 1/2 of a question and then realised that my answer was wrong so ha ha sorry fRancis chong you will continue to not see my tutorial :}

realised that there's already a clique forming in my class ... and i'm not in it sigh. it includes 6/9 of the girls (or 5/9? not sure about that last girl) and they have an exclusive whatsapp group and everything wtf can they not please. thought that since we have so few girls in our class we'd be more ... inclusive. well i thought wrong :(

tuesdays are the days i end later than the rest of my class which is sad because they went for class lunch #2 without us again </3 so gillian blazer and i had a lonely lunch in the near-empty rj canteen :'( aiya idk la i can't talk to just 2 other people when they aren't both yknow owners of a vagina. also i bought yong tau foo which was so hot i couldn't drink the soup at all. but it was cheap ($1.80 only!)

wednesday is the day i have the dreaded ~*PE AM*~ plus assembly (yawn) plus chem prac (crying) gAh. i guess i should stop writing this and instead get started on the blaze thing so i can sleep earlier and face tomorrow with gusto but ........ hahahaha

anyway yesterday night i was kaypoh so i went to read through the RI a'levels report and the HCI a'levels report and comparing the 2 schools well i realised that RI really performs better o_o sigh around 339 (i think that's the number? can't really remember) RI students attained a perfect UAS. 339! this school is really crazy man why am i even here? all i did was not fail PSLE :( it's only after i entered an IP school that i realised just how unfair this whole system is. we're basing everything on just one single exam - the PSLE - which is not even a reliable test of intelligence / academic ability (as evident from IP sch students like me oops). there are so many more deserving students than i of a place in this premier institute ... and yet i'm here and they're not. just because i was luckier / studied more / was smarter in P6.

maybe i should really start working hard for a's. i really don't know what i've been doing with my acads for the past 10 years but maybe i should start doing and submitting homework on time ok faith is motivated



.... i went to get water and now i've lost all my motivation ah well nevermind goodnight
all the overdue homework can just become even more overdue