i typed out a post and then accidentally closed the window and blogger didn't save a draft for me :(


anyway happy birthday desiree!! :D really your present & card will come soon no kidding. here's a picture for you though c: people were being peeping toms so i only had around 5 minutes to create something T_T hope you like it anyway c:


yesterday was the field trip to the artscience museum and i think it's a real pity that it's a guided tour because i would have liked to explore the museum in my own time, without my heavy backpack that made my left shoulder so red and swollen afterwards. i was sad and lonely like how i would be for the rest of the week because both janelle and pei xuan have SYF training every day, for the whole day. i don't really mind being alone because i find it's much better than feeling pressurised to say something to people T_T (i really don't get how the rest of the world can make small talk so easily and so naturally) but people will judge and they stare and they think and they make assumptions. i guess we all live in a world where social birds are much appreciated (they're probably the majority, too) and lone rangers discriminated u_u if you're seen without a friend people think "weird kid" "oddball", etc and people say "no man is an island" but is it really true??? ok sorry i'm truly weird and an oddball and maybe i should just join the autistics / IMH :c


... so i heard lots of old and ancient people are coming back this youth day holiday. hahaha i'm quite scared certain scary people will come back especially my beloved potato chips (i am in great fear of her right now) but i doubt she'd ever come back for a 45th-related event ever again :c i kind of have very mixed fillings about this.

oh oh today:
"but i do love snare drumming :')" -eileen's LJ
i agree that it's quite fun but i'd probably never do it again / do it like once in a green and orange moon (why blue moons? green and orange moons are even rarer and much much more precious) because if you are reading this you'd know that i'm a very slow learner and not the sharpest tool in the shed :( i really hate condescending looks / comments and learning new things is one of the few times when i'd really appreciate it if people would lie and say "good job!" and smile and go over my points for improvement in a very encouraging tone

that's all before i get caught
night i've been sleeping a lot lately :(

p/s: sometimes i really think i'm secretly autistic or something yknow i'm socially awkward and i'm dumb i seem to fit the description perfectly